What is wrong with this picture?
Sledgehammer has competition for Game of the Year
Well I think it has a contender - aren't you glad I am not writing some depressing post about how much of a miserable shit hole England is?
This is England.
I walked into my local Co-Op a few weeks ago looking to buy some San Miguel and Pittas, it was a standard Monday evening if you will. I noticed that something was wrong as soon I got to the fresh vegetables aisle. Having spent almost 7 years in retail you acquire this weird ability to detect trouble, I can’t explain how nor can I shake it but when I enter a shop and there is some kind of malcontent fulminating I can feel it.
It happened as I was browsing the frozen food section – don’t ask me why I was dawdling as I always going to get pizza if I get anything at all and staring at the other dishes is pointless.
Badger Commander reviews ‘The Hunger Games’ film. Sort of.
I wrote a review for ‘The Hunger Games’ and sent it to Craig who writes about films, to be fair it was a pretty straightforward and the piece that Craig wrote was way better
I ended up scrapping it and instead you get this:
The Hunger Games review: a dialogue involving one person.
April Fool's, I am a terrible person.
This isn't the April Fool's.
The April Fool's was the RainnWilson S (named after the actor in who plays Dwight in the US version of The Office) post on Arcadian Rhythms. The list was actually written about 5 years ago, I barely had to do any updating to keep it with the times.The reason I wrote it at the time was because I had overdosed on Gamefaqs reviews and top ten lists due to that being the only site I had access to. Gamefaqs is a terrible place to go for information that is not related to game walkthroughs by the way and as a result it caused a brain rot. My distaste got the better of me to the point where I would email writers with sarcastic comments pretending to praise them for the work they had done. I think I upset one writer so much that they removed their content from the site and I may be indirectly responsible for why there are no longer contact email addresses for writers. I was, and still am, a terrible person.
For the April Fool's I could have just written the top ten and been done with it.
The whole thing is littered with bait, I knew that Solid Snake was not the main character in MGS 3, I knew that the image displayed was for Mario Kart 64 not the SNES version and of course I picked the X360 'version' of Pac-Man. That was the point.
Not satisfied with just churning out an old post I decided to go a bit further. I created a profile and got work accepted on gamefaqs.
The idea was to take inspiration from some of the worst offenders and rolling them into one persona.
I wrote a total of 4 reviews, and 2 were approved. Not sure that the other 2 will get through, so instead, feast on Rainn Wilson's final 2 opuses (this includes screenshots of other games, simply because I had some spare and wanted to use them).
BC Ruminates: There is nothing quite like English Xenophobia
I went to the cinema last night to see 'The Hunger Games'. Incidentally, it was pretty good and fans of the book should make the effort to go and see it as it not only does the book justice, while managing to find its own voice, but is a decent film in its own right. This is not a film review blog so I won't go into much more about that.
No, as I sat down and waited for the film to start a series of adverts were plastered on to the screen, I normally don't pay much attention but this one caught my eye because Stephen Fry was in it:
Holy shit, I love me a bit of hype, preferably in a can
People who came here from facebook on the strength of this image, shame on you.
I got up in the morning and was having a wonderful fucking day dream about a release of Ghouls n Ghosts on a console that was worth owning. It was the kind of warm dream that only really happens for other people when they get some kind of letter from their parents or their boss telling them how worthwhile they are.Well that bouble burst as I woke up and checked my email in an attempt to validate my life.
I had been trying ignore the Sci-Fi/real history crap that was the Assassin's Creed. I really couldn't give a flying fuck up Gina Gershon's private places (I apologise now to Gina Gershon I am pretty certain you don't deserve shit) about Animus or some crappy story about Templars. Frankly, the mechanics were so coma-inducingly awful that if I wanted a game that half-played itself I would go back Asura's Wrath one more time.
What the Blue blazes is that abomination?
Sorry, busy trying to get some review copy up on Arcadian Rhythms, with the busy tri-fecta of NeverDead, Haunt and - of course - Asura's Wrath taking up all of my review time. I still had to weigh in on this absolute abomination.
http://www.giantbomb.com/akira-gets-all-up-in-your-dead-or-alive-5/17-5766/
I really have too much time on my hands, Vol 4
Sooo, this is the final part of the breakdown of 2011, it was a good year. At the beginning I wrote a letter to Ving Rhames complaining about how much the games seemed to be sucking. But by the end I was stumped for choice as to what would be my top 5 games of the year. Between September and December some truly great games came out, some of them I haven't finished yet.
I really have too much time on my hands, Vol 3
I hope all of you had a good weekend, mine involved drinking heavily and swearing at motion controls, in between doing that I drank more and wrote reviews and updated excel spreadsheets. Just found out about some of the crazy Microsoft scams that have been affecting users and quite frankly it is sad that this is still going on. I know two people who have been directly affected by it and it certainly isn't a pretty thing. The common theme seems to be FIFA 2012 or another EA game (Madden is another one that commonly crops up), so my advice is do as I have been doing and avoid most EA games.
